My mind has been wandering to moments i've had with him. The moments that felt like he was everything God had planned out for me. My father always told me when I was younger that when I found "him" that i'd just know, because that's what happened to him, and if I wanted the same thing it would happen. Well, the moment I met him my mind wandered to the future. Literally, I looked at him and something in me told me he was it. I believe so much that it was God, but then theres part of me that doubts that because of how he feels. But then again I remember my parents story. My father knew my mother was the one, while my mother was sitting there going I hope I don't marry someone like him. So maybe, just maybe I will have the same story as them. Or maybe, i'm just holding on to false hope. My heart tells me yes Bekah, he's it, yet the more rational side of me says no Bekah, you are too young to ever even know. It's a constant battle between my heart, and my mind. Between what I believe God has told me, and what I don't know is the truth or not.
I'm 17, and I have the world ahead of me. I have the best friends I could ever ask for, and the best family God could ever bless me with. I'm going to college soon and that will be a whole new world of experiences and temptations in which I will overcome. I know i'm young, but God speaks to the young generations just like he speaks to the old generations. I've spoken to a few people about what I feel about him. A few people think i'm right. I've asked for proof from God, and everytime I do I get little signs. For instance, the baby names coincidence, when he randomly told me he wanted to name his son Daniel Ezekial, and considering I wanted my kid to be Ezekial Daniel. There's so many other little things, like how he carries a rock around in his pocket and how i've had a "pet rock" since 9th grade because of a friend. I used to carry it around all the time, but I haven't been recently. Still, we both have a rock that we keep. That's pretty strange. I don't know, everything is so ironic with him. His family loves me, and I love his family. My parents adore him, they even brought me to the dr.phillips hospital to see him when he was having seizures. Our families get along, and i'm best friends with his brother. I think though the biggest confirmation for me was when he was singing this christian worship song once when it was raining, and I started softly singing along with him. We were at Islands of Adventure with a lot of my friends, and we both looked at each other in the eyes and smiled as we sang softly together under our breathes. It was the best feeling. There's so many times i'll call him and he tells me he's reading a book of the bible, and so he can't talk until he's done because he's trying to get through the whole bible this year. I love it, I love seeing his status being about God all the time. I remember once seeing him at his church playing with this little girl, and me thinking how well he'd work with kids. This was before I had accepted my calling as a childrens minister. I still want to know if what I believe God has told me so long ago is the truth, but I guess I will have to wait. Whoever he does end up marrying, will be lucky, because he is going to make a great father, and a great husband.
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