The Notebook

Is probably one of the most tear jerking movies I have ever seen. I don't cry during movies, but everytime I watch the Notebook I bawl. Last night was horrible because it caused me to be depressed though. :(

Lead Me To The Cross

So, I've officially been 18 for four days now. It's been a strange four days. I really feel so stressed with college, and it's making me sleep less. I'm also thinking more then usual about my future, and everything in it, and to tell you the truth I'm scared. I'm scared to someday get married. I'm scared to someday be a mother. I'm scared to follow God's will and be a Children's minister. But, through the fear, I know God has everything in His arms. He holds me everyday, and He wants me to realize that I belong to Him. So, I give my life to Him. The fear will be there, but the constant worrying, and sleepless nights will begin to vanish as long as I focus on knowing God has it in His hands.

I don't exist.

According to the federal government I do not exist. I found this humerous, but also quite depressing at the same time. I filed my FAFSA a few weeks ago, and in order to do that you have to give them your social security number. Well, today I get home and see mail from FAFSA and I was expecting to hear about my status. Well, I did find out my status, my status is I need to fix things on my FAFSA. So, I looked at what it said was wrong, and they said my name does not match up with the one on my Social Security. I believe my name is Rebekah M Bentley, and I know I put the right ssn, I even went and checked, my social security card even says REBEKAH BENTLEY, on it. But according to FAFSA, which is federal financial aid, I do not exist lol. I need to figure out how to fix this, because I need financial aid really badly...

Also, I need to burn the happy shirt. Ever since the first time I wore it something bad had happened. lol, and so I wore it today and I had a crummy day, and John's arm is apparently in a sling now because he hurt his wrist. It's the happy shirts fault, it's filled with evil. lol, I don't really believe that, but it's very weird that when I wear it something bad happens. My friends have gotten to the point if they see me wearing that shirt they get away from me. It's kind of sad.

So, I turn 18 in 6 days. I see Samantha saturday and i'm pretty darn excited!

Pineapple Heart.

I love you Samantha! I just felt like telling you that through a blog. =]

I Love Pi.

Pi day is coming up. I'm pretty excited. I have to memorize pi for math class for extra credit. Every digit equals 1 point of extra credit. I shall type all that I know so far.

3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097494459230781640628620899862803482 (I think thats all right...)

The Way The World Turns.

The last week has been a very interesting and hard week. So much has happened, and I can't seem to cry, although I feel I really need to. I always cry, so I don't understand why I can't right now. People have decided they like to be dumb this past week, and the level of disrespect I am seeing is repulsive. It's not only teenagers but it's also adults. Adults gossip so much, and when you are gossiping about someone in front of a teenager be careful what you say. Today I experienced the band parents talking crap about my band director. I adore Lamos, and I felt I needed to stick up for him. But I wasn't gonna be disrespectful so I just got up from where I was and whispered I was tired of the negativity. But it's true. So what we went to assessment and couldn't get graded because our band couldn't play the required grade level pieces, so instead of sounding bad he had us play lower level pieces so we sounded good. It's not about the grade, it's about the music. Music is beautiful, and it should be about how you feel when you play it, not about getting a superior. I am proud of my band, and proud to be apart of it. For what we played we sounded amazing, and I think the judges should of given us a grade, but it's the rules. We played, and we played good, that's all that matters. I just find it repulsive when parents are speaking wrongly about someone who has only done good for their child by instilling music into their lives.

Well, as you can see I went to MPA today (music performance assessment) for band, and it was held at Ocoee High. I was soo happy I got to see so many of my friends from Ocoee, and I saw my west orange friend, and my apopka friends so it was a pretty good time. Minus Daniels ex calling me and cussing me out for "stalking" daniel and for "liking daniel", and the stupid band parents my days been okay. No, I do not like Daniel, and I do not stalk him. I love John though for protecting me. He's amazing.