SEU and band.

Since August 22nd I have been living in Lakeland, Florida and attending college at Southeastern University. Honestly, academically speaking I wish I could tell you it's everything I hoped. But it's not. It's pretty much how I figured it would be. Nothing very special, minus the fact it's a christ-centered university. Spiritually speaking my school has it made, but academically...not so much. It's okay, I know God has me here for a reason, and I do like my school, it's just different from where I know I personally want to be. I personally want to be in the marching band somewhere, and traveling from state to state every Saturday that there is an away game. If God didn't call me to be a children's pastor, I could of seen myself being a High School band director. I would of done DCI every summer until then..insane? Yes? Maybe? I could of done it.. It's weird, now that I'm actually not in band anymore because my schedule just can't fit it, my heart feels empty. Education for once is coming before band...and it's hurting me everyday. You can ask my friend Marissa in college. Everyday atleast twice I say "I miss Band." Actually I've realized being in band for six years has given me many important qualities that you need in the real world. Like, for instance being on time... "To be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late." I've noticed especially in college I like to be there early, while everyone walks in late. I can't be late..it bothers me. I feel I should run a lap if I'm late. That's another thing band gave me. Discipline. It disciplined me to always want to be the best. I personally am grateful for my experience in band. It prepared me the most for where I am today.

Now, back to SEU. I got off topic. As much as I wish I were in the band at say UCF, or FSU, I do know God has me where I am supposed to be for spiritual reasons. Since being here God has been working wonders in me, and I have matured quite a lot. Anyone who said christian college was perfect is wrong because there is still the wrong crowd here, but I think the reason God has been working wonders in me, is because it's His plan for me here you know? My favorite place on campus is the lake, which I rarerly go to, but I love praying there. God always speaks to me in marvelous ways there, in the beautiful nature of the lake. As much as I may miss band, and have a need to march on the field again and to play my instrument, God has it in His hands and He's doing things in and through me.

You know. I'm also very different here. I don't speak in class. Ever. I don't give my opinions out loud, because I'd rather write it in an essay and astound the professor then to let everyone know how smart I really am. I'm not trying to sound braggy or anything like that, but back in high school everyone KNEW I was smart and I hung with all the smart kids and so we all spoke our answers all the time. I've become the quiet kid in class who just listens. I'm paying for the class anyways, so I'm listening and analyzing everything and when it comes to it I'll write my essays, and how smart I am will come through writing instead of speech. I also eat lunch alone a lot. It's weird. I have friends, but if they aren't in the cafeteria I don't sit with random people. When normally, I would. I also am not as social here. I don't get it. I do a lot, but at the same time don't do a lot, if that makes ANY sense. It's weird.

I miss home. I miss Samantha and all my best friends---but I'm learning a lot of valuable life things here. I know I'll make it. God has a plan! And God's plan is good!