2010.
A new start. A new beginning. It's time where I take life and give it all into God's hands.
Have you ever felt like all you ever do is try but fail? You try so hard to make people happy, you sacrifice your own joy, your own happiness for that of others, but yet in the end it kicks you in the face?
I don't expect people to sacrifice for me. But I guess it can be a curse of sorts to care so deeply about people, because you always wind up hurt. This happens to me all the time.
It sucks.
But I know that my caring heart has a bigger plan. It has a purpose, and God is molding it everyday. This is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it. No matter the circumstance.
Even when I am stepped on, even when I am spit in the face, or punched like a punching bag. He is strong, and therefore I am made strong in Christ. This year, I am making it my goal when things go wrong, to never underestimate my Jesus.
I have failed at being the example Christ has set me to be. Starting now, at 12:04 AM on January 2nd, I make a commitment to try my best to be a better person. Self-control with my tongue, with my mind, with my emotions. It all starts NOW.
Where You go I'll Go. What You Say I'll Say, God. What You Pray I'll Pray.
Friday, January 1, 2010
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Tug of War.
"Oh, scarecrow, it ain't so bad just try and fit in this hollow mess 'Cause you've traveled so far From where it all began..."
The world is spinning around me and my mind goes blank. Images of days when everything was perfect pop up at different moments in the scene playing in my head. A single rose, falls to the floor, the book is finally closed. My princess fairy tale didn't have the happily ever ending that most fairy tales have, but it did however have an ending. After years of my heart playing an unending game of tug of war, it did not end in a stalemate, there was a winner. They say a broken heart feels like glass being smashed, into millions of tiny tiny pieces. That there's bits and pieces hidden in hard to find places, and although you can find the big obvious bits, it's impossible to clean it all up. You can cover up or deny that they're there, but they're there. This is how my heart has felt for years. Shattered like glass. But in the end- I proved to come out victorious in the never ending tug of war match.
I pulled, I gave everything I had left in me. Sweat, blood, tears, and gasping for breathe. His heart versus mine, in a brutal battle to see who could finally win the title. Do you wanna know how I won? Eventually he was pulling harder then ever before, you could see the veins bulging out of his neck and the pulsing heartbeat from his chest, and so I left go. He fell to the ground in what seemed like slow motion, and I was left standing victorious in the face of his defeat. I offered my hand to lift him back up, but he stood and shook off the dust and walked away without a sound coming from his lips. I watched him walk away from the match, and I smiled brightly knowing finally it was over, and I could finally rest. So I turned the other way and walked with pride, and walked with joy knowing I had won something that day, and a new day was coming, one that didn't involve tug of war.
The world is spinning around me and my mind goes blank. Images of days when everything was perfect pop up at different moments in the scene playing in my head. A single rose, falls to the floor, the book is finally closed. My princess fairy tale didn't have the happily ever ending that most fairy tales have, but it did however have an ending. After years of my heart playing an unending game of tug of war, it did not end in a stalemate, there was a winner. They say a broken heart feels like glass being smashed, into millions of tiny tiny pieces. That there's bits and pieces hidden in hard to find places, and although you can find the big obvious bits, it's impossible to clean it all up. You can cover up or deny that they're there, but they're there. This is how my heart has felt for years. Shattered like glass. But in the end- I proved to come out victorious in the never ending tug of war match.
I pulled, I gave everything I had left in me. Sweat, blood, tears, and gasping for breathe. His heart versus mine, in a brutal battle to see who could finally win the title. Do you wanna know how I won? Eventually he was pulling harder then ever before, you could see the veins bulging out of his neck and the pulsing heartbeat from his chest, and so I left go. He fell to the ground in what seemed like slow motion, and I was left standing victorious in the face of his defeat. I offered my hand to lift him back up, but he stood and shook off the dust and walked away without a sound coming from his lips. I watched him walk away from the match, and I smiled brightly knowing finally it was over, and I could finally rest. So I turned the other way and walked with pride, and walked with joy knowing I had won something that day, and a new day was coming, one that didn't involve tug of war.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Where My Passions Have Went.
I really need to write, to get my thoughts out. But nothing is coming. Don't you hate that when you sit for hours at your computer hoping something will come that sounds good enough, that is worth writing, and worth the reader actually taking time out of their busy schedule to sit down and read? That's the rut I am currently in.
I love writing, and it's a passion of mine that I no longer do as much as I'd like. Writing and music have always been the two ways I express myself, and when you no longer do either of those you feel dead. In high school I was in band, and that kept me mentally sane because I could express myself in ways my writing couldn't. When I wasn't writing, I was playing music, and when I wasn't playing music I was writing. These two passions of mine have kept me stable.
I wish I had the words to express how writing, and how music makes me feel. It's always been my anti-drug. I think the reason my world is so confusing right now, and why everything has been spazzing out on me is because I don't take the time to write, and because I'm not in the band program. I can't change the band program issue right now, but I could still play my french horn every time I went back home, which I desperately need to do. I miss it, it's my heartbeat. I however can change the fact I don't write. I used to write all the time, whether it was in this blog, in my common place book, on my phone or on random papers that got thrown away..I still wrote. I need to write again, poetry, stories, blogs, my feelings, what God's been speaking to me, whatever it is, I need to write it out.
I'm at the beginning of a new chapter in my life, one that involves me becoming more mature, and becoming what God has planned for me to be. In this chapter I will grow, but in this chapter I refuse to let go of music and writing. It's through these two passions that I am who I am. So I will try- I will try with my best efforts to write, and to play my heart out.
I love writing, and it's a passion of mine that I no longer do as much as I'd like. Writing and music have always been the two ways I express myself, and when you no longer do either of those you feel dead. In high school I was in band, and that kept me mentally sane because I could express myself in ways my writing couldn't. When I wasn't writing, I was playing music, and when I wasn't playing music I was writing. These two passions of mine have kept me stable.
I wish I had the words to express how writing, and how music makes me feel. It's always been my anti-drug. I think the reason my world is so confusing right now, and why everything has been spazzing out on me is because I don't take the time to write, and because I'm not in the band program. I can't change the band program issue right now, but I could still play my french horn every time I went back home, which I desperately need to do. I miss it, it's my heartbeat. I however can change the fact I don't write. I used to write all the time, whether it was in this blog, in my common place book, on my phone or on random papers that got thrown away..I still wrote. I need to write again, poetry, stories, blogs, my feelings, what God's been speaking to me, whatever it is, I need to write it out.
I'm at the beginning of a new chapter in my life, one that involves me becoming more mature, and becoming what God has planned for me to be. In this chapter I will grow, but in this chapter I refuse to let go of music and writing. It's through these two passions that I am who I am. So I will try- I will try with my best efforts to write, and to play my heart out.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
SEU and band.
Since August 22nd I have been living in Lakeland, Florida and attending college at Southeastern University. Honestly, academically speaking I wish I could tell you it's everything I hoped. But it's not. It's pretty much how I figured it would be. Nothing very special, minus the fact it's a christ-centered university. Spiritually speaking my school has it made, but academically...not so much. It's okay, I know God has me here for a reason, and I do like my school, it's just different from where I know I personally want to be. I personally want to be in the marching band somewhere, and traveling from state to state every Saturday that there is an away game. If God didn't call me to be a children's pastor, I could of seen myself being a High School band director. I would of done DCI every summer until then..insane? Yes? Maybe? I could of done it.. It's weird, now that I'm actually not in band anymore because my schedule just can't fit it, my heart feels empty. Education for once is coming before band...and it's hurting me everyday. You can ask my friend Marissa in college. Everyday atleast twice I say "I miss Band." Actually I've realized being in band for six years has given me many important qualities that you need in the real world. Like, for instance being on time... "To be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late." I've noticed especially in college I like to be there early, while everyone walks in late. I can't be late..it bothers me. I feel I should run a lap if I'm late. That's another thing band gave me. Discipline. It disciplined me to always want to be the best. I personally am grateful for my experience in band. It prepared me the most for where I am today.
Now, back to SEU. I got off topic. As much as I wish I were in the band at say UCF, or FSU, I do know God has me where I am supposed to be for spiritual reasons. Since being here God has been working wonders in me, and I have matured quite a lot. Anyone who said christian college was perfect is wrong because there is still the wrong crowd here, but I think the reason God has been working wonders in me, is because it's His plan for me here you know? My favorite place on campus is the lake, which I rarerly go to, but I love praying there. God always speaks to me in marvelous ways there, in the beautiful nature of the lake. As much as I may miss band, and have a need to march on the field again and to play my instrument, God has it in His hands and He's doing things in and through me.
You know. I'm also very different here. I don't speak in class. Ever. I don't give my opinions out loud, because I'd rather write it in an essay and astound the professor then to let everyone know how smart I really am. I'm not trying to sound braggy or anything like that, but back in high school everyone KNEW I was smart and I hung with all the smart kids and so we all spoke our answers all the time. I've become the quiet kid in class who just listens. I'm paying for the class anyways, so I'm listening and analyzing everything and when it comes to it I'll write my essays, and how smart I am will come through writing instead of speech. I also eat lunch alone a lot. It's weird. I have friends, but if they aren't in the cafeteria I don't sit with random people. When normally, I would. I also am not as social here. I don't get it. I do a lot, but at the same time don't do a lot, if that makes ANY sense. It's weird.
I miss home. I miss Samantha and all my best friends---but I'm learning a lot of valuable life things here. I know I'll make it. God has a plan! And God's plan is good!
Now, back to SEU. I got off topic. As much as I wish I were in the band at say UCF, or FSU, I do know God has me where I am supposed to be for spiritual reasons. Since being here God has been working wonders in me, and I have matured quite a lot. Anyone who said christian college was perfect is wrong because there is still the wrong crowd here, but I think the reason God has been working wonders in me, is because it's His plan for me here you know? My favorite place on campus is the lake, which I rarerly go to, but I love praying there. God always speaks to me in marvelous ways there, in the beautiful nature of the lake. As much as I may miss band, and have a need to march on the field again and to play my instrument, God has it in His hands and He's doing things in and through me.
You know. I'm also very different here. I don't speak in class. Ever. I don't give my opinions out loud, because I'd rather write it in an essay and astound the professor then to let everyone know how smart I really am. I'm not trying to sound braggy or anything like that, but back in high school everyone KNEW I was smart and I hung with all the smart kids and so we all spoke our answers all the time. I've become the quiet kid in class who just listens. I'm paying for the class anyways, so I'm listening and analyzing everything and when it comes to it I'll write my essays, and how smart I am will come through writing instead of speech. I also eat lunch alone a lot. It's weird. I have friends, but if they aren't in the cafeteria I don't sit with random people. When normally, I would. I also am not as social here. I don't get it. I do a lot, but at the same time don't do a lot, if that makes ANY sense. It's weird.
I miss home. I miss Samantha and all my best friends---but I'm learning a lot of valuable life things here. I know I'll make it. God has a plan! And God's plan is good!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
You Are Good.
You promised me, so I put my trust in You. You answer in three ways. “Yes”, “No.” or “Wait.” So… I will listen, and I will “Wait.”. I need to stop doing this on my own, and put my trust in You. If You said it’d happen, then it WILL happen. There is NO need to worry anymore. No need to beat myself up for not being perfect, no need to cry, no need to feel inferior. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. I know now more then ever that you have my future in Your hands. I can’t keep pushing something that may not be what You really promised to begin with. But whatever it is that You have promised, it WILL come to pass. I believe full heartedly that one day, it will happen, and when it does I will praise Your name for the strength You’ve given me to hold on through the storms. Thank you Father for always being with me wherever I go. I will sing you praises for You are Good and Your love endures forever.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Putting My Senses To Work
Before I start this blog out, I just want to say that God is amazing. I want you all to know that if you ever have anything going on in your life where you feel like you can't handle it anymore, that you've finally reached the end, that God is going to be there to lift you up, and to hold you in His loving arms.
Now. The point of this blog, is to explain what God spoke to me about today. During prayer, I sat in my place between these two stacks of chairs. At first, I was extremely tired, and was praying, "Oh Lord, how am I going to get through this without falling asleep?" But then, I just began to read the passage of scripture I've been re-reading everyday. Ezekial 37:15-28. But, after I read the passage, I closed my bible and just started praying. I want to tell you something. Never underestimate God in your life. He will surprise you sometimes. Especially when you are about to fall over into a coma because you need sleep lol. So, I started to pray and the words that came out of my mouth were completely Spirit-Inspired, and I think I need to share with you what basically God had come out of my mouth.
So many of us seem to believe in God, and believe that He exists, and at the same time so many of us don't believe in him at all. Those of us who do believe, why do we believe? And, How do we know Him? Those who don't believe, why don't you believe? What evidence do you have? Let me tell you a way I experience God. Through the senses. Look at the tall trees, the night sky, the shining stars, the bright moon, and the ocean's splendor. You see God. Smell the flowers, the sweet aroma of your favorite food coming out of the oven, the smell of pine,of vanilla, or apples. You smell God. Touch the silky fabric of your favorite dress, the touch of your dog as it runs up to play with you, the touch of you holding your favorite stuffed animal as you lay down to sleep at night, the touch of two small fingers running down your face and knowing that you gave life to the child you are holding. In all this. You touch God. Listen to the sound of the piano, or the sound of a beautifully composed piece of music that causes shivers to go down your spine, listen to Beethoven, Bach, Rachmaninoff, Strauss. Listen to the air, to the sound of breathing. To the french horn, and the flute. You hear God. It is through our four main senses, sight, smell, touch, and hearing that we are able to distinguish the beauty of God. I can't understand how anyone looks at the world, see's the world, hears the sounds, smells the aroma's, and touches the surfaces but reject's God. You reject God, but yet accept the trees? You reject God, but yet accept the piano? It is through God that all these were formed, and through God that we are able to experience such glory.
I praise Him for giving us such beauty. In times of trouble, in times of recession, and darkness, all we have to do is look, smell, taste, and hear, and we can know the presence of God is still there at work, everyday. Isn't that exciting to know? I think we all need to just take some time to sit back and really pay attention to our senses. If we do, we may find God in ways we never expected to before.
Now. The point of this blog, is to explain what God spoke to me about today. During prayer, I sat in my place between these two stacks of chairs. At first, I was extremely tired, and was praying, "Oh Lord, how am I going to get through this without falling asleep?" But then, I just began to read the passage of scripture I've been re-reading everyday. Ezekial 37:15-28. But, after I read the passage, I closed my bible and just started praying. I want to tell you something. Never underestimate God in your life. He will surprise you sometimes. Especially when you are about to fall over into a coma because you need sleep lol. So, I started to pray and the words that came out of my mouth were completely Spirit-Inspired, and I think I need to share with you what basically God had come out of my mouth.
So many of us seem to believe in God, and believe that He exists, and at the same time so many of us don't believe in him at all. Those of us who do believe, why do we believe? And, How do we know Him? Those who don't believe, why don't you believe? What evidence do you have? Let me tell you a way I experience God. Through the senses. Look at the tall trees, the night sky, the shining stars, the bright moon, and the ocean's splendor. You see God. Smell the flowers, the sweet aroma of your favorite food coming out of the oven, the smell of pine,of vanilla, or apples. You smell God. Touch the silky fabric of your favorite dress, the touch of your dog as it runs up to play with you, the touch of you holding your favorite stuffed animal as you lay down to sleep at night, the touch of two small fingers running down your face and knowing that you gave life to the child you are holding. In all this. You touch God. Listen to the sound of the piano, or the sound of a beautifully composed piece of music that causes shivers to go down your spine, listen to Beethoven, Bach, Rachmaninoff, Strauss. Listen to the air, to the sound of breathing. To the french horn, and the flute. You hear God. It is through our four main senses, sight, smell, touch, and hearing that we are able to distinguish the beauty of God. I can't understand how anyone looks at the world, see's the world, hears the sounds, smells the aroma's, and touches the surfaces but reject's God. You reject God, but yet accept the trees? You reject God, but yet accept the piano? It is through God that all these were formed, and through God that we are able to experience such glory.
I praise Him for giving us such beauty. In times of trouble, in times of recession, and darkness, all we have to do is look, smell, taste, and hear, and we can know the presence of God is still there at work, everyday. Isn't that exciting to know? I think we all need to just take some time to sit back and really pay attention to our senses. If we do, we may find God in ways we never expected to before.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Of Knights and Princesses Part 2: The Wind and The Fire
John's Story =]
Once upon a time there was land called Rumo. Rumo was a land bordered by volcanos that spewed fire into rivers of fire that acted as a natural defense for the people that lived there. In addition to this formidable shield, the Rumoans saw fit to build walls and forts and castles to maintain a state of security for themselves. They built great roads and bridges that forded these rivers of molten rock as well as great canals to prevent their safeguard from becoming their doom. Upon one of these great roads our story begins with a Knight on an errand of personal significance. Now, this was no ordinary rider for two reasons: First, he was a knight from a distant country; and second, the steed upon which he rode was a giant wolf. Steel grey and as big as a horse, this was a Fordacian Wolf. Strong, swift and full of stamina the wolf pounded along the dusty red road, throught the checkpoints of the Rumo defenses and on toward the great Fortress Pyrasa that was home to the leader and guardian of Rumo. As he approached the castle he took in it's magnificence. It's mighty towers, it's impressive battlements and ever watchful was teh banner of Rumo, a crimson dragon blazoned upon a golden field a jet of flame issuing from between it's teeth. For the dragon was the emblem of rumo. Dragons were used as symbols of power and hope, as well as used as steeds for the Rumoan Cavalry and Air Corp. The gurards let him pass and stabled his wolf. The Chief Advisor to the Lady came to meet him, a dark skinned man by the name of Devinicus. "What brings you to Pyrasa good knight?" I have urgent need to speak with your mistress." "The Lady of Fire is, at this time, indisposed." "Don't give me the runaround Devinicus, I need to speak with her immediately." Devinicus looked uncomfortable for a moment and then led the knight into a chamber off the main courtyard. "I know why you have come and, if truth be told, I am glad of it. word has reached our ears of the battle you fought in Bentilus." "Then you also know that the Lady of Water sent for your mistresses aid and that that that call went unanswered, now why is that I wonder?" "If you must know, the Lady has been ill for quite some time." "Ill? What do you mean ill?" "I mean, she has not been herself of late. Everyone in the castle has been beside themselves with worry, but she has forbidden us to tend to her or to even send to our allies for aid." The knight pondered this for a moment and then said, "Take me to her." Such was the grimness of his face that Devinicus did not question the order he had just been given, but led him directly to the Lady's chamber. He knocked twice and a feeble voice said "Enter." The Lady was sitting in a chair by the window, her red hair fell neatly upon her shoulders, she was wearing robes of fine white linen with a flowered sash about her waist. She did not look up when they entered, but instead said absentmindedly, "Yes Devinicus, what is it?" The knight could hear a great weariness in her voice."The Wolf Knight of the Wind is come to see you m'lady." At this she turned and when she saw the knight standing there she leapt to her feet, but immediately swayed and would have fallen if the knight hadn't rushed to her side to catch her. He lifted her easily into his arms and carried her to the bed. When they had gotten her some wine to drink and a watersoaked towel for her her head, the Lady dismissed Devinicus and he bowed himself out of the room. "If I'd known you were coming I would have made you a better welcome, what brings you here so unexpectedly?" Ignoring her question, he said "Why did you not send to me that you were ill? I could have been here much sooner." "I did not want you to worry about me. You have your own affairs to look after without having to rush to my side whenever I feel a little faint." She tried to laugh, but it died in her chest and a cough took it's place. "Erica, you know as well as I do that this is no common cold." She sighed as she looked into his eyes. "I don't have the strength to pretend to you anymore. I fear that I may be dying. The flame that once burned bright within me has almost gone out." He put his hand on hers and she looked at him again. "Is there nothing that can be done?" he asked, fighting back the sorrow that was rising in the pit of his stomach. "Nothing that I have the strength to endure. There is only one thing can save me now I fear and that is Everfire that burns deep within the bowels of Mount Christia which lies at the heart of my country. Everfire gave me new life when I was but a child and I know that it could give me life again, but, alas, I have not the strength to make that journey and to face those perils." He stood, "Then I shall go. I shall go and retrieve this Everfire and bring it back here to you, that you may live." She suddenly looked fearful and grasped his hand in both of hers, "No, John, you must not. It is far too dangerous. I could never ask someone to brave the perils of that quest for me." "You did not ask me, nor do you have to. I will go, I will find this Everfire and I will save you or die in the attempt." Erica tried to get up, to try and persuade him not to go, but he gently pushed her back down onto the bed and her weariness returned and she did not rise again and could only look on him with pleading in her eyes. "I shall not fail you m'lady. I shall return." and with that, he left her chamber and made for the stables. Devinicus joined him shortly and after hearing all that had transpired he immediately set about explaing Everfire and the ancient safeguards that surrounded it. "Any man that seeks Everfire must pass three tests. The first, a test of strength. The second, a test of will. The third, a test of heart." "what are these tests?" "The scrolls do not say." Undeterred, John made his way to the gate where his wolf, Roshta was waiting. Waiting beside him was one of the Cavalry Dragons harnessed and ready to depart. The dragon was a little larger than Roshta with bright green skin dappled here and there by brown spots. It's yellow eyes followed the two men as they approached and it's talons clicked against the stones of the courtyard in anticipation of the race to come. A man dressed in the scarlet of the Rumoan Cavalry walked toward them and saluted John. "I am Raxos, I will be your guide to the mountain and back." Thank you, we must not tarry for great haste is needed." The two men mounted their steeds, turned their heads toward the open gate and kicked them into a run leaving the those that laid behind in a cloud of dust. Soon they were far away, galloping through the Nothern Plain on their road south to the mountain. Such was the speed of Roshta and the Rumoan Dragon that before the sun had reached it's zenith on the third day they came to the top of a small hill and looked out onto a wide plain. In the center of the plain, stood a great pinnacle of rock wreathed with flame about it's peak. They came to the base of Mount Christia just as the sun began to sink beyond the western horizon. "Here I must leave you, for the Mountain will not suffer both of us." said Raxos. Without another word, John proceeded up the mountain. He climbed for the better part of an hour until he reached a wide level shelf that led to a doorway carved into the side of the mountain. Now, the sun had nearly set and as the last fleeting rays retreated beyond the rim of the world John took a deep breath and plunged into the mountain. The passage went deep into the mountain and soon all was darkness but for the flickering light of the torch that he had brought with him. He continued on until he came out of the darkness and into a high chamber ringed with fire. On the opposite side stood another doorway. John did not stop to wonder at this chamber, but continued straight toward the other side. Immediately he was rooted to the spot by a deep, booming voice. "Who dares enter this sacred place? By what right do you tempt my wrath? Speak quickly that I might know you before I snuff out your life." In a clear voice John answered, "It is I, The Wolf Knight of the Wind. I have come on an urgent errand to seek Everfire for Erica, Lady of Fire and Guardian of all Rumo." "Why does the Lady of Fire send such a one as you to seek what only she has the right to claim?" "She has fallen terribly ill and is unable to make the journey and so I have come in her stead of my own will." The booming voice released a rumble of laughter. "So, you think you can claim Everfire? You think that you will succeed where so many others have failed?" "I will do what I must for the Lady." "Very well then knight, you must first face a test of strength before you can claim the Everlasting Flame." Suddenly fires burst into life all around the chamber and from those fires stepped shapes of warriors in blood red armor and with swords that shone with a terrible light. Drawing his own sword and feeling the urgency of his quest upon him, John reached down into himself and called upon the Wolf within. A snarl and a howl escaped his lips as he leapt into battle, his sword a mere flash of light as it slashed this way and that, felling foe after foe. Again and again his sword fell with such ferocity that even these wraiths of fire and steel quailed and fled. When all had been slain or driven off, john sheathed his sword and proceeded thought the second door. He wasn't in the tunnel long before it opened onto a chamber identical to the one he had just left. This chamber, however, was filled, from wall to wall, with gold and jewels and every sort of precious thing imaginable. A narrow path down the middle of the chamber led to another door and the booming voice rang out again. "Now, you must face a test of will. In this chamber is wealth beyond imagining as well as artifacts of such great power that he who possesses them could rule all the world. Now you must make your choice. All of these wondrous things are yours to do with what you will, in exchange for the abandonment of your quest. Turn back now and you will find all of these things waiting for you when you return to your home. Proceed and all of this shall be lost to you forever. Choose." The full weight of comprehension fell upon him then as images of what he could do with such wealth and power, of all the evils that he could conquer, the lives that he could improve with what was being offered him. What was one life against many? All these things passed though his mind in an instant and the next they were gone, replaced with a single burning motivation. He did not walk, but he ran down the narrow aisle between the mountains of gold and through the third door. He did not look back, though he could tell by a sudden of the lessening of the light behind him that all the treasures had vanished forever. He came into the third chamber and froze. Sitting before him, it's massive wings folded against it's crimson body, it's yellow eyes boring into him like beams of light, was an enormous dragon. For a moment the two just stared at each other and John felt as if the dragon was searching his very soul. Then the dragon said, "I am Firion the Great, Guardian of the Everlasting Flame and you, John SilverWolf have passed the third test. Your heart is true and you have proven yourself worthy to claim Everfire." The dragon shifted it's body to reveal a tree that was engulfed in flame, but that was not consumed by it. John stepped forward and felt the blazing heat of the fire and could go no further. Firion then extended a single claw toward the tree and scooped out a some of the flames as if he were picking apples. A silver flask appeared out of thin air and Firion siphoned the flames into it. When he had replaced the stopper and handed it to John he said, "Now go, the Lady of Fire is fading fast and it has fallen to you to save her. Go with all speed and the blessings of Firion." "Thank you, my lord. I shall not fail." and with that he turned and dashed out the way he had come. When he emerged from the mountain side he could see the sky turning gray in the east and he could hear the first few birds begin to sing their welcome to the coming dawn. He bounded down the mountain and reached the camp just as Raxos was readying the fire for breakfast. "No time for food my friend." he shouted as he readied Roshta's harness, "We must ride with all speed at once." Surprised and a little disappointed by the sudden dismissal of breakfast, he quickly readied his steed and within fifteen minutes they were thundering northward with the silver flask tucked tightly against John's breast. The days and night's flew by and finally, heaving and panting they came to a halt inside the gate at Castle Pyrasa. A short while later, John was holding the silver flask to Erica's lips and as the fire poured down her throat and spread all throughout her body she revived. She stood and went to the window, breathing in the morning air. She turned to them all and laughed, a strong, clear laugh full of mirth. That day a great feast was held to celebrate the Lady's return to health and the festivities lasted long into the night. The Lady and the Knight sat in her garden looking up at the pale moon sailing through the night sky. They said nothing. They didn't need to.
Until the next time...
Once upon a time there was land called Rumo. Rumo was a land bordered by volcanos that spewed fire into rivers of fire that acted as a natural defense for the people that lived there. In addition to this formidable shield, the Rumoans saw fit to build walls and forts and castles to maintain a state of security for themselves. They built great roads and bridges that forded these rivers of molten rock as well as great canals to prevent their safeguard from becoming their doom. Upon one of these great roads our story begins with a Knight on an errand of personal significance. Now, this was no ordinary rider for two reasons: First, he was a knight from a distant country; and second, the steed upon which he rode was a giant wolf. Steel grey and as big as a horse, this was a Fordacian Wolf. Strong, swift and full of stamina the wolf pounded along the dusty red road, throught the checkpoints of the Rumo defenses and on toward the great Fortress Pyrasa that was home to the leader and guardian of Rumo. As he approached the castle he took in it's magnificence. It's mighty towers, it's impressive battlements and ever watchful was teh banner of Rumo, a crimson dragon blazoned upon a golden field a jet of flame issuing from between it's teeth. For the dragon was the emblem of rumo. Dragons were used as symbols of power and hope, as well as used as steeds for the Rumoan Cavalry and Air Corp. The gurards let him pass and stabled his wolf. The Chief Advisor to the Lady came to meet him, a dark skinned man by the name of Devinicus. "What brings you to Pyrasa good knight?" I have urgent need to speak with your mistress." "The Lady of Fire is, at this time, indisposed." "Don't give me the runaround Devinicus, I need to speak with her immediately." Devinicus looked uncomfortable for a moment and then led the knight into a chamber off the main courtyard. "I know why you have come and, if truth be told, I am glad of it. word has reached our ears of the battle you fought in Bentilus." "Then you also know that the Lady of Water sent for your mistresses aid and that that that call went unanswered, now why is that I wonder?" "If you must know, the Lady has been ill for quite some time." "Ill? What do you mean ill?" "I mean, she has not been herself of late. Everyone in the castle has been beside themselves with worry, but she has forbidden us to tend to her or to even send to our allies for aid." The knight pondered this for a moment and then said, "Take me to her." Such was the grimness of his face that Devinicus did not question the order he had just been given, but led him directly to the Lady's chamber. He knocked twice and a feeble voice said "Enter." The Lady was sitting in a chair by the window, her red hair fell neatly upon her shoulders, she was wearing robes of fine white linen with a flowered sash about her waist. She did not look up when they entered, but instead said absentmindedly, "Yes Devinicus, what is it?" The knight could hear a great weariness in her voice."The Wolf Knight of the Wind is come to see you m'lady." At this she turned and when she saw the knight standing there she leapt to her feet, but immediately swayed and would have fallen if the knight hadn't rushed to her side to catch her. He lifted her easily into his arms and carried her to the bed. When they had gotten her some wine to drink and a watersoaked towel for her her head, the Lady dismissed Devinicus and he bowed himself out of the room. "If I'd known you were coming I would have made you a better welcome, what brings you here so unexpectedly?" Ignoring her question, he said "Why did you not send to me that you were ill? I could have been here much sooner." "I did not want you to worry about me. You have your own affairs to look after without having to rush to my side whenever I feel a little faint." She tried to laugh, but it died in her chest and a cough took it's place. "Erica, you know as well as I do that this is no common cold." She sighed as she looked into his eyes. "I don't have the strength to pretend to you anymore. I fear that I may be dying. The flame that once burned bright within me has almost gone out." He put his hand on hers and she looked at him again. "Is there nothing that can be done?" he asked, fighting back the sorrow that was rising in the pit of his stomach. "Nothing that I have the strength to endure. There is only one thing can save me now I fear and that is Everfire that burns deep within the bowels of Mount Christia which lies at the heart of my country. Everfire gave me new life when I was but a child and I know that it could give me life again, but, alas, I have not the strength to make that journey and to face those perils." He stood, "Then I shall go. I shall go and retrieve this Everfire and bring it back here to you, that you may live." She suddenly looked fearful and grasped his hand in both of hers, "No, John, you must not. It is far too dangerous. I could never ask someone to brave the perils of that quest for me." "You did not ask me, nor do you have to. I will go, I will find this Everfire and I will save you or die in the attempt." Erica tried to get up, to try and persuade him not to go, but he gently pushed her back down onto the bed and her weariness returned and she did not rise again and could only look on him with pleading in her eyes. "I shall not fail you m'lady. I shall return." and with that, he left her chamber and made for the stables. Devinicus joined him shortly and after hearing all that had transpired he immediately set about explaing Everfire and the ancient safeguards that surrounded it. "Any man that seeks Everfire must pass three tests. The first, a test of strength. The second, a test of will. The third, a test of heart." "what are these tests?" "The scrolls do not say." Undeterred, John made his way to the gate where his wolf, Roshta was waiting. Waiting beside him was one of the Cavalry Dragons harnessed and ready to depart. The dragon was a little larger than Roshta with bright green skin dappled here and there by brown spots. It's yellow eyes followed the two men as they approached and it's talons clicked against the stones of the courtyard in anticipation of the race to come. A man dressed in the scarlet of the Rumoan Cavalry walked toward them and saluted John. "I am Raxos, I will be your guide to the mountain and back." Thank you, we must not tarry for great haste is needed." The two men mounted their steeds, turned their heads toward the open gate and kicked them into a run leaving the those that laid behind in a cloud of dust. Soon they were far away, galloping through the Nothern Plain on their road south to the mountain. Such was the speed of Roshta and the Rumoan Dragon that before the sun had reached it's zenith on the third day they came to the top of a small hill and looked out onto a wide plain. In the center of the plain, stood a great pinnacle of rock wreathed with flame about it's peak. They came to the base of Mount Christia just as the sun began to sink beyond the western horizon. "Here I must leave you, for the Mountain will not suffer both of us." said Raxos. Without another word, John proceeded up the mountain. He climbed for the better part of an hour until he reached a wide level shelf that led to a doorway carved into the side of the mountain. Now, the sun had nearly set and as the last fleeting rays retreated beyond the rim of the world John took a deep breath and plunged into the mountain. The passage went deep into the mountain and soon all was darkness but for the flickering light of the torch that he had brought with him. He continued on until he came out of the darkness and into a high chamber ringed with fire. On the opposite side stood another doorway. John did not stop to wonder at this chamber, but continued straight toward the other side. Immediately he was rooted to the spot by a deep, booming voice. "Who dares enter this sacred place? By what right do you tempt my wrath? Speak quickly that I might know you before I snuff out your life." In a clear voice John answered, "It is I, The Wolf Knight of the Wind. I have come on an urgent errand to seek Everfire for Erica, Lady of Fire and Guardian of all Rumo." "Why does the Lady of Fire send such a one as you to seek what only she has the right to claim?" "She has fallen terribly ill and is unable to make the journey and so I have come in her stead of my own will." The booming voice released a rumble of laughter. "So, you think you can claim Everfire? You think that you will succeed where so many others have failed?" "I will do what I must for the Lady." "Very well then knight, you must first face a test of strength before you can claim the Everlasting Flame." Suddenly fires burst into life all around the chamber and from those fires stepped shapes of warriors in blood red armor and with swords that shone with a terrible light. Drawing his own sword and feeling the urgency of his quest upon him, John reached down into himself and called upon the Wolf within. A snarl and a howl escaped his lips as he leapt into battle, his sword a mere flash of light as it slashed this way and that, felling foe after foe. Again and again his sword fell with such ferocity that even these wraiths of fire and steel quailed and fled. When all had been slain or driven off, john sheathed his sword and proceeded thought the second door. He wasn't in the tunnel long before it opened onto a chamber identical to the one he had just left. This chamber, however, was filled, from wall to wall, with gold and jewels and every sort of precious thing imaginable. A narrow path down the middle of the chamber led to another door and the booming voice rang out again. "Now, you must face a test of will. In this chamber is wealth beyond imagining as well as artifacts of such great power that he who possesses them could rule all the world. Now you must make your choice. All of these wondrous things are yours to do with what you will, in exchange for the abandonment of your quest. Turn back now and you will find all of these things waiting for you when you return to your home. Proceed and all of this shall be lost to you forever. Choose." The full weight of comprehension fell upon him then as images of what he could do with such wealth and power, of all the evils that he could conquer, the lives that he could improve with what was being offered him. What was one life against many? All these things passed though his mind in an instant and the next they were gone, replaced with a single burning motivation. He did not walk, but he ran down the narrow aisle between the mountains of gold and through the third door. He did not look back, though he could tell by a sudden of the lessening of the light behind him that all the treasures had vanished forever. He came into the third chamber and froze. Sitting before him, it's massive wings folded against it's crimson body, it's yellow eyes boring into him like beams of light, was an enormous dragon. For a moment the two just stared at each other and John felt as if the dragon was searching his very soul. Then the dragon said, "I am Firion the Great, Guardian of the Everlasting Flame and you, John SilverWolf have passed the third test. Your heart is true and you have proven yourself worthy to claim Everfire." The dragon shifted it's body to reveal a tree that was engulfed in flame, but that was not consumed by it. John stepped forward and felt the blazing heat of the fire and could go no further. Firion then extended a single claw toward the tree and scooped out a some of the flames as if he were picking apples. A silver flask appeared out of thin air and Firion siphoned the flames into it. When he had replaced the stopper and handed it to John he said, "Now go, the Lady of Fire is fading fast and it has fallen to you to save her. Go with all speed and the blessings of Firion." "Thank you, my lord. I shall not fail." and with that he turned and dashed out the way he had come. When he emerged from the mountain side he could see the sky turning gray in the east and he could hear the first few birds begin to sing their welcome to the coming dawn. He bounded down the mountain and reached the camp just as Raxos was readying the fire for breakfast. "No time for food my friend." he shouted as he readied Roshta's harness, "We must ride with all speed at once." Surprised and a little disappointed by the sudden dismissal of breakfast, he quickly readied his steed and within fifteen minutes they were thundering northward with the silver flask tucked tightly against John's breast. The days and night's flew by and finally, heaving and panting they came to a halt inside the gate at Castle Pyrasa. A short while later, John was holding the silver flask to Erica's lips and as the fire poured down her throat and spread all throughout her body she revived. She stood and went to the window, breathing in the morning air. She turned to them all and laughed, a strong, clear laugh full of mirth. That day a great feast was held to celebrate the Lady's return to health and the festivities lasted long into the night. The Lady and the Knight sat in her garden looking up at the pale moon sailing through the night sky. They said nothing. They didn't need to.
Until the next time...
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